Travelogue - UK - 1

Travel bug was injected into my system at a very early age. Transfers were part and parcel of my father's job and he never missed an opportunity to visit new places. And being a family man, we always travelled with him. Since my birth we shifted from Bombay, Hyderabad, Chandigarh, Bhubaneswar, Guwahati, Hyderabad and back to Mumbai. And we never failed to visit all places of interest in and around the place of stay.

After marriage, I managed to pass the bug to my husband. Willingly or unwillingly he obliged to my demands for travelling and visiting new places. Here I would like to share some of our experiences. As is evident in the title, there are many such anecdotes I would like to share and instead of boring you with one long monologue, I will serve it bits and pieces.

First stop UK, London. London is a nice place except for the weather. For a major part of the year, it is very chilly and windy. Whenever the mercury touches 20 degree C, it is considered to be hot and people used to remark that it must be like back in India. When I tell them that it was very pleasant compared to the normal temperatures in India, they would be surprised and wondered how we could work in those conditions!

Much more to come later.....

I longed to see the Buckingham Palace but it does not look like a palace at all. Of course, our image of a palace is conditioned by the many Indian palaces we got to see with lavish lawns, spacious durbar halls, intricate carvings etc. The Palace is open to visitors from July to September when the Queen takes up her summer residence at Windsor. The interiors are rearranged to facilitate visitor movement. But all we got to see are the state rooms only - the personal quarters are off limits. Other interesting places in London are - Trafalgar Square with Nelson’s Column and pigeons all over. Big Ben (not so big) Westminster abbey (that was beautiful), London Bridge over River Thames (it was too good for words) and Hyde Park.

Our next stop was at Greenwich to see the Royal Observatory, with all its old time telescopes and other machines and the Royal Maritime Museum, where we got a hands-on-experience of how it feels to be inside a submarine. There were computer simulated fights where one could give orders to fire and all that stuff. I still remember the big expanse of green and the loitering one can do there. Of course this was before millennium, when all the rides and other stuff got installed. 

Me and My Maidservant

The other day an advertisement on TV caught my attention. About business ideas or was it domain names? Anyway, this lady was conducting training course for maidservants. The highlight was they were being taught how to excuse themselves from work, amusing, but how true when it comes to leave-taking-excuses all maids have the same excuse.

For every housewife in India, maidservant is a hot topic of discussion. Our day begins with the thoughts will she come today? If she does come, will she be in a mood to do some extra work or will she abstain from the regular duties. We all tread very carefully around her, not to offend her. We think twice before saying anything. My mil greets hers with a hot cup of coffee. My mom, and many others I know, has two maids, so one covers for the other in case of leaves. One lady pitches in doing one of the maid's chore, in case she needs any extra work to be done. Gone are the days you deduct from salary in case of absence. I know of a lady who refused to grant leave to her maid, result? The maid quit, of course, do we have any say in it? In Mumbai, the servants talk not only about salary, but also number of leaves per month and diwali bonus. One of my maids used to crib that I dont cook at home during festivals (we go either to my in-laws or parents place), she doesnt get any pindi vantalu. I made it a point to get something for her on those special days. She also had well-manicured nails, I always wondered how she managed. Well her work spoke of it, if you get my drift.

My experience with my current maid is unique. She has been working for me for past 6 yrs, a record as far as I know in my circle. She is very hard-working, loyal and a conscientious worker, who hardly takes a day off. She is very flexible and doesnt mind any extra work. Doesnt ask for anything extra either. I should be happy, you say? Well, while I am glad that she is sincere and loyal, her conscience is too much for me to handle. Some days, I will be busy with something else and I ask her to skip mopping, she compensates by washing the balcony with extra care. End result, I have not saved any time. When we come back from a vacation, she sweeps and mops with extra care and takes ages to complete the task, result I end up waiting for her to leave to take rest after a tiring journey home. She mops the floor, especially the frequently used areas, at least twice (hubby says three to four times) which sometimes becomes tiring to watch. Of course, I do have a neat and shining floor, as is my kitchen. She doesnt talk much, no gossip for her. So end result I am always the last one to know of the happenings in our building. She has her quirks, though. Everything has to be jumbo size for her. She wants a big scrubber, big bucket, big broom etc.. She is very brand specific - only Pril, Lysol and Harpic for her. No other product will do. Given the end-product I dont mind either.

Coming from US, I found it difficult to adjust to concept of servants. Once there, I got used to being independent, doing chores whenever I was free. Now, my day has to be planned around her timings. I have to ensure that I am home when she is expected, else mess everything up. Of course the timing is not accurate, it is literally any time in a 2hr framework, if I am lucky. Sometimes I get vexed with this dependency and am tempted to be independent but not courageous enough to take that step. To tweak a well-known saying, "Maids - cant live with them, cant live without them"

Prejudices

The other day we met a friend, she was meeting my husband after a long time. She asked whether I cook well, I am sure she asked casually and it was an idle chit-chat. But it triggered a series of thoughts. We are all prejudiced and tend to type cast people.
I remember when I was newly married, an elderly lady at my inlaws asked my husband if I cooked at home. After getting an answer in affirmation, she probed further "does she cook onions", a big taboo in her kitchen. My husband retorted with "she will if I ask her to". I didnt know to respond. More recently a neighbor asked what was cooking in our kitchen, it was bitter gourd. She gave her approval only after confirming that my husband does indeed like bitter gourd. Even now I am not sure how to respond. A woman is supposed to cook and that too only what her husband likes????

Prejudice is deep set in our minds, be it domestic situation, fashion statement or dress sense. We always judge people by their gender, appearance. Their behavior comes last. I am not saying it is right or wrong. I do it all the time. I want to ask for directions, I pick a decently dressed, preferably female but for most instances an auto wallah or chai baddi wallah will be of better help. I see a person with unkempt hair, I assume they are highly disorganised. We see a man struggling with his kids we are all sympathetic and look around for the mother. At the same time we see a woman struggling with her kids, we doubt her parenting skills. Our reaction is just the opposite if instead of kids they are struggling with their vehicles.
What is the root of this prejudice? Are we justified in behaving this way? How many times have we fallen into this prejudice trap only to be proved wrong?

Tech-savvy Senior Citizens

When Dad retired, we were a bit worried as to how he will react to all that free time. Its been a while and we are yet to hear of him getting bored. The thing that keeps him and my mom occupied is technology. They are hooked on to TV, watching serials which I pity them for, but they seem happy. The other thing is computer. Their (or rather my mom's) tryst with computer began with emails, their way of keeping in touch with me and my brother in US. Then they upgraded to chat, video conferences and Skype. Then to online banking and other transactions. Now it is their yahoo group.

Couple of years ago my mom and her siblings started yahoo group. We gave them 6 months, max, and by then we were sure their interest would wane off and it would be long forgotten. With 68,000 messages in 4yrs they are still going strong. What do they do? They keep in touch with everyone, forward inspirational messages and interesting news bites, conduct online quizzes, share songs and videos over youtube, you name it and they have done it. It is really heartening to see their commitment to it. They log on twice or thrice in day, it is part of their routine now. One of my uncle is an expert net-surfer, he gathers all these interesting sites and shares them. He keeps uploading these wonderful images and links to cool websites.  One of my Aunt has become a writer, she writes stories in Telugu and sends it to the group in a serial format. For those who cant read Telugu there is an audio file. Recently she expanded her horizon to blog. My mom posts her stories. Then there are poetry and prose competitions. Come festival and there is a culture enlightenment for our generation. They share pictures of gatherings, they share travel news. It is amazing how much one gets to know in this group. Their common bond, apart being same family, is love for Telugu music. Song clips and links are regular features here.

It is not just them. I see all around me senior citizens being net-savvy. What started from a desire to keep in touch with children and grandchildren has turned into an hobby. My father-in-law is active in LinkedIn, he always keeps himself up-to-date with technology. He has dual-sim gsm phone and is planning on getting himself a notebook. My mother-in-law has iPhone, of course she likes playing games on it, she hates smart phones. My mom has iPad. Sometimes I feel like I am from their previous generation, with me harping about my desktop, landline and radio!!!!!

Hats off to them.